Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Sometimes you need to check the spelling

On Sunday in church we were asked to spend some time listening to God as He had a word for each of us that He wanted to speak over our life this year.  As I closed my eyes I smiled as I had already heard God speak, my word was hope, and I started to pray but my thoughts kept being interrupted by the word 'no'.

My words not hope? I asked, 
'no' came the reply, 
so what is my word?
'no' again.  

I dismissed this as there was no way my word for the year was 'no', I was not going accept what I thought was a negative word, this was to be year of change and growth and I had decided that hope was my word, I needed hope to be my word. I was clinging onto hope.

Throughout the night I wrestled with this, each time I prayed, or thought of the word hope I heard 'no' and eventually after a rubbish sleep I woke and as I started my quiet time thanking God for the hope I had for the day and heard once again 'no'.... I argued back asked why, why could I not have hope, why did I have to have 'no'?

And then, as I really listened I heard the word one more time, 'know', be still and 'know'.

So my 'hope' borne out of a place of uncertainty, from a situation I felt alone, something I was clinging onto,  has  been replaced with a 'know' coming instead from  a place of assurance and has me wrapped in security.

Psalm 46:10
“Be still, and know that I am God;

Thursday, 5 January 2012

If it was good enough for Moses it's good enough for me!

Here is my first 2012 ramble.......
I have a good life, I have a wonderful caring funny husband with an infectious laugh, talented amazing kids, family who support us and friends that make the journey of life such good fun. I also have a great job, I manage events for our church, and get to combine my organising skills and love of people in one roller coaster ride.

In December God put the brakes on the ride as I had surgery to remove my gallbladder. the timing was not great, I would be away for all the Christmas events and not surprisingly Christmas tends to be quite big in my job! He was gracious with me and I knew it was coming up so I had time to put plans in place for all the events at church and home and then I had to walk away and let others take on the reins.

Delegation is not an easy thing for me and I really don't know why. I know that plenty of people can do what I do, that my way is not always the better way, but somehow I struggle to ask, not wanting to impose, or put people out. Sometimes this gives me a task list overflowing and I hit headless chicken mode, cramming my days with good stuff and then the God stuff slips off track and the days become like treacle.

But earlier in the year God had been putting things in place to help me and since September I have had a Kerith Academy student working alongside me. These young guys and girls give a year to Kerith, to learn, to serve and work in different ministry areas. I know Pauline is learning but goodness me she is helping me to learn too. I have had to delegate stuff to Pauline so that she can learn and this process has been has been a revelataion to me, she takes full ownership of tasks she gets and does them amazingly, and importantly she does them her way and to my surprise I am cool with that. Both Pauline and the amazing Kerith Team of staff and volunteers picked up all my tasks during my recuperation, and did amazing jobs putting on amazing events.

For me I am now going into 2012 with a renewed attitude to delegation, handing over, seeking help, because it's so much more fun, relaxing, growing to do things together and share responsibility, and leaves more space for God stuff in my day. Plus there is Godly biblical principle to back up my choices, in Exodus 18 Moses is working himself day and night serving the people, getting weary and the task list ever growing.
His father in law pointed out "What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone." (Exodus 18:17-18 NIV) and with encouragement Moses finds a capable group to delegate to giving him space to do a good job with God like the title if its good enough for Moses...